They told me yesterday. I’m not Chuck Norris. I cried like a baby. A helpless little baby. My bravado evaporated and I wept and shook.

There’s so much I still want to do. Yet I can’t.

I will die tomorrow.

I’ve gotten religion. It was a decision I made after much thought. I called a priest this morning and asked him to baptize me. I talked to him about making me a priest too. He said to give it some time, it was a big decision. The biggest, I said, and hurry up about it. I’ve become a new man.

The priest asked me what I would do if I were to be freed. I said I’d be a useful member of society. I’d get a job. I’d pay my taxes. God forgive me for evading the law for so long. I’d obey the traffic signs. Help old ladies cross the street. Tithe. Donate blood. Go to the villages in the remotest jungles and bring stacks of Bibles. Read the newspapers. Vote.

No longer will I knock down anyone in my way. I’ll be polite. I’m not going to plot to take advantage of the old and the young and the weak, only those who deserve it. I won’t live recklessly. Life is precious. I realize that now. My life is precious and I’ve wasted it.

I know now ignorance of the law is no excuse. My advice to everyone reading this: don’t be ignorant. I know mixing around with bad people is bad, so bad. Please. Don’t make my mistakes. Mistakes have consequences. I was brash and stupid back then. Reckless. You must understand. I know I didn’t until justice caught up with me.

Justice is good.

I cannot tell the government to abolish the death penalty. That means nothing coming from a dead man. I feel no anger or hate. There is no one to blame, but I forgive you. Forgiveness comes easy toward the end. If my words do nothing to persuade you that sentencing another human being to death is wrong, please read on. Sentencing another human being to death is wrong. God said not to murder.

I have so much potential. I’ve only been born. I’ve only just started thinking about life and death. I think about good and evil. Love and hate. I see life differently. Even the colors have changed. How does it make sense to snuff out a life like that? So if it’s not too much trouble, please overlook decades of debate and the rule of law.

I may have lived like the law didn’t apply to me my whole life. I just ask for an exception. This one last time.

Save your pity. Don’t judge me. Don’t. Laugh. Cry.

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